All of us here at Scarlett Ramey Official appreciate your support in our observance of Blackout Tuesday. We closed the office for an entire day to deep dive ways we could help permanently eradicate racism. While Scarlett Ramey Official is back open, our support does not end there. This is just the BEGINNING of our commitment to this cause. On this issue, we are determined to use our voices and this platform to raise awareness and funds to protect our black lives, and all lives. Scarlett Ramey Official is adamant about making a real difference, and if you’d like to join the support for racial justice, we will be giving you resources to directly aid this movement. 

We are so proud of those who have bravely used their platforms to affect change, and NOW is the time to join voices to champion racial justice. Thank you so much for all of your support. We couldn’t have done it without you!
To learn more about how you can contribute, 

How you can help the Black Lives Matter movement and protesters in NYC right now

If you are looking for more ways to uplevel your business and life, I would be honored if you became an SRO Insider.

Subscribe Here:

If you’re into it, feel free to share this with someone you KNOW needs to hear these words!

Yours in love and support,

Scarlett Ramey

P.S. Hope to see you in the comments. Let’s rally together during this time and stay connected to stay on business growth journey.  The world deserves the BEST of you.


Remember your clients this Mother’s Day! I’ll be handing out  my personalization ideas that can cross over from the beautiful Mothers in your life to your favorite mom clients.  Business is just another relationship, where the more genuine you can be, the more successful you’ll be, so let’s look at the clients you have who ARE Mothers. Think outside the corporate gift “box,” here. Flowers, chocolates, even a bottle of wine can all be personalized to be memorable, and here are eight memorable ways to do it this Mother’s Day.

1.  Attach a handwritten thank you note.

Not just, “Thanks for your business.” Truly remember what you’ve heard through working with them about their experiences as a mother. Remind them to take it easy on this day, as they have been important as a role model, friend, or example of a mother. Use THEIR words as much as possible.

2.  Write a funny story.

Remember that time, you were working together and she made you laugh so hard, you snorted? OK maybe not, but if you DO have these moments with a client who is also a mother, laughing can solidify you in their memory. Tell her you appreciate the fact that she makes time for you in her life, when you KNOW she is a mother with 1,000 other responsibilities. Remember to tell her you can’t wait to laugh that hard again with her.

3.  Gift them an experience with you.

ONLY for the mothers who you’d get together with ANYWAY. This is creepy otherwise.  Invite them over for a binge of their favorite show on Netflix with wine and popcorn. Get a spa appointment together. Take her on a mountain bike ride with lunch, or coordinate a girls weekend.

4.  Gift them an experience AWAY from their children

Offer her a slumber party at her house for her kiddos while she and her partner get away. Provide all the fun, food, treats, makeup parties, and activities. A night where a mother KNOWS you’re making her kids super happy while she gets some time away will also solidify you in her memory as one of the best gifts EVER. Remember, clean up EVERYTHING before she gets home.

5.  Book them a spa day

This is always a nicety when people have everything already paid for, (including the tip) and don’t have to think about anything except relaxing. If lunch is an option, include it, and the tip. Make it just for her, no partners, or kids allowed. Take the kids for the day if you feel comfortable, for the ultimate relaxing day for your mother friend or client.

6.  Put together a wine tour for just your mother friends/clients.

This can be super fun. Introducing your mom friends and clients to each other, and helping to foster new friendships is a fabulous gift. Get a wine tour for as many wine loving mothers in your life, and let the tour guide do everything, while you start connecting the moms to each other, and deepen your relationships with your friends and clients.

7.  Host a Bad Moms Brunch.

At a restaurant or your home, if appropriate, host a large brunch, complete with mimosas, and fun finger foods. Play fun “Bad Mom” games, share your best Mom stories, worst moments, and things you’d NEVER admit to as it would be too embarrassing. The more comfortable you can make the moms in your life the easier they’ll feel about spilling the tea and connecting with each other.

Personalizing the gifts to the moms in your life will make you stand out as a VIP in their future lives. This is pertinent in building fabulous business relationships, as well as fun and fulfilling friendships. 

If you are looking for more ways to uplevel your business and life, I would be honored if you became an SRO Insider.

Subscribe Here:

If you’re into it, feel free to share this with someone you KNOW needs to hear these words!

Yours in love and support,

Scarlett Ramey

P.S. Share with me in the comments YOUR best Mother’s Day ideas! Let’s rally together during this time and stay connected to stay on business growth journey.  The world deserves the BEST of you.


With business changing its marketing rules, the guidelines for a successful modern website have changed to sell to our lowered attention spans.  The following are interesting new guidelines that either were taboo, previously, or thought of as marketing suicide. These are now the new standards for the market to even pay attention to, let alone buy from.

1.  A “Buy Now” button above the fold.

Above is a newspaper term that actually means, the stories, headlines, or images that appear on the newspaper without having to unfold it. Being anything “above the fold” is very expensive real estate, as these items appears immediately as people browse while shopping. For instance, people tend to purchase a whole newspaper based on the items they see above the fold. 

So what does this mean on a website? Exactly the same thing! When people pull up any website, especially on a mobile device, they are looking for the point. If you sell something, you NEED the “Buy Now” button on the page people see first, without scrolling. How many times have you gone to a website, ONLY to purchase a product, and you find that you have to hunt down the purchase button? It’s maddening! Make sure it is right there, big and bold, JUST for the people that are ONLY going to your site to purchase. People like me with content ADD with thank you!

2.  Be blunt, if not crazy clear, about what it is you do. 

State above the fold what you do that SOLVES an issue your customer needs fixed. We used to take the website as a creative license to really reflect who we were, what our values were, and possibly how we came to build the business through our passion to help others. Now? Your customer wants that to be a tab they have the option to click, not content they have to wade through to get to whatnot is they came for.

The operative word here is THEM. As you create your website, think about how your customer wants to navigate it. If you sell something and advertise your website, understand, that when the FINALLY reach your website, they are ready to buy. Make your website easy to SHOP. 

3.  Be upfront with prices on your website.

This used to be sacrilege! Don’t talk about money until you lead them through the sales process. Then negotiate. Not anymore, folks! Our buyers want to know immediately what the price is.  It actually allows them to purchase faster because there’s much less time to analyze a product before purchasing. The more specific you can be about what your selling, and posting the price, plain as day, the easier it is for them to say, “Yes!”

These all used to be unheard of marketing techniques until we ran out of our customer’s time. We now have seconds to gain attention and sell. Price, attention, and location are now the new director in this marketing movie.

If you’re into it, feel free to share this with someone you KNOW needs to hear these words!

Subscribe Here:

If you’re into it, feel free to share this with someone you KNOW needs to hear these words!

Yours in love and support,

Scarlett Ramey

P.S. Hope to see you in the comments. Let’s rally together during this time and stay connected to stay on business growth journey.  The world deserves the BEST of you.


They are your BEST and BRIGHTEST right? They are the employees you feel are your fingers on the pulse of your industry, the ones you trust more than some family members. You know the ones. Your company’s ride-or-dies. The ones you feel more support from than anyone, because they KNOW what you’re going through every day.

They know the stresses your company places on you as an entrepreneur, and they are right there with unicorns of solutions coming out of their asses right when you need them to save the day. They make decisions as though they owned the company whenever you’re there or out of town.

They get angry about ANYONE who doesn’t love your company the way you do. They are your EVERYTHING, and you want to treat them like solid gold. So they’d NEVER keep anything from you, right? WRONG. The following are three things your finest team members just won’t tell you.

1.  They need you.

They NEED you to care openly about them. They need you to need their help. They need to be recognized as your hero. They need you to WANT to know about their life outside of work. They need you to want to help them with their OWN dreams. They need your support and encouragement through their OWN struggles, and they need to hear you tell them how you REALLY feel, if you know you couldn’t do it without them.

2.  They want their own personal carrot.

Everyone in the company gets a bonus, every certain amount of accomplishments, or over a certain period of time, but they need to feel special, and it actually might be a lot less expensive! I had an employee go through a beginning-of-life crisis at the age of 23.  He truly needed to find himself, and all he wanted was to travel the world. Once I finally got this out of him, I asked why he was hesitant to tell me. He was concerned I’d feel like he wasn’t being loyal. 

He needed PROOF this wasn’t the case. I told him to get in the car, and we went to the FedEx store to get his passport ordered. I helped him schedule the trip through Europe, and all I had to do was give him the time off, UNPAID! He thought this was the greatest thing, and the most love anyone has EVER shown him. I told him to really think about the type of work that would fill his soul, and I would do EVERYTHING to create that position within my company.

He came back, having thought about the intersection between his happiness and the growth of the company, and KNEW it was sales. I told him to try it out for a month, and I coached him on sales. It meant so much to him personally, and he was able to serve the company in ways we all could never have expected.  

3.  They won’t tell you someone in the company is toxic.

If you have these employees, you know what I’m talking about. They work to the point where you have to drag them out of the office. They need you to ask them, consistently, what support looks like for them. Asking them how they’re doing, or if they’re doing ok is a death wish. The answer will always be “fine,” or “yes,” or “no worries.” 

You’ll walk away thinking everything is fine. This definitely is true when someone ELSE in the company is toxic, or being outwardly unsupportive of them. The funny thing is they don’t even care what the toxic person thinks of them.  They care more about you feeling hurt about hiring the toxic person in the first place. They really believe you must KNOW this person treats them poorly, and that you are just fine with it. 

All the while, you are clueless, and would NEVER allow your best employees to be abused by a toxic team member. It will be like pulling teeth, but you MUST ask specific questions about how they feel about the team in general and what they would do if you were not around and needed them to make the company’s best decisions. 

Remember, these employees are your company’s life-blood, and without them, you know, the culture just wouldn’t be the same. Make them feel like an owner, depend on them, and let them know they are the HEROES of the company, and you’ll never have to look farther.

If you are looking for more ways to uplevel your business and life, I would be honored if you became an SRO Insider.

Subscribe Here:

If you’re into it, feel free to share this with someone you KNOW needs to hear these words!

Yours in love and support,

Scarlett Ramey

P.S. Hope to see you in the comments. Let’s rally together during this time and stay connected to stay on business growth journey.  The world deserves the BEST of you.


Time is relative. No REALLY, it is! If we think about it, we seem to NEVER have time, when we need it most. The mornings where you wake up in a rush to get your kiddos to school, your self ready, and the dogs fed, are not all that different from each other, but why? Even when you wake up super early, there is STILL not having enough time. 

When the kids throw blueberries all over the floor, and you didn’t anticipate for this, it’s like time gets even SHORTER! When we do this, we actually shorten the perception of our time, because we are convinced we are already going to be late for the next thing on our schedule.  

So how do we get our time back? The following are time hacks to give you REAL results, and more importantly, relief from the “fit it all in” mentality.

1.  Schedule time for the crazy.

So, my girlfriend Sally’s daughter, EVERY morning, takes an HOUR to get dressed for school. An HOUR! She has teeny tiny clothes, not many choices, and this seems ridiculous (to anyone without a young daughter). Each morning, Sally and her daughter fight over the fact that she NEEDS to pick an outfit so they are not late, AGAIN. When I suggested she actually schedule an hour for getting dressed, Sally took me up on it with a shrug. To this day, the daughter still takes ALL 60 minutes, but Sally is able to enjoy her daughter in the mornings, instead of fighting with her. She can try on four different outfits, and both Sally and her daughter are at peace. When her daughter gets up in the morning and starts putting on different outfits, Sally and she are right on time, doing EXACTLY what is scheduled for that time.

2.  Log your energy

This is a difficult exercise but well worth it! Attempt to log your energy at LEAST once per day if not every 2 hours for a whole month. 

Or a week. 

Or just today. 

When your energy is high, and you feel like being with people, networking, and presenting, make sure you pay attention. We’ve all been asked to be outgoing when we would rather stab our eyes out with hot pokers, right? This is a misalignment of energy, as there ARE times you’d enjoy nothing more. Here’s another insight into why logging more will result in more benefits.  When you know which times during the day, days during the week, weeks during the month and seasons during the year you feel different levels of energy, you can actually schedule your outgoing and extroverted activities when YOU’LL feel MOST like doing them. Do you just lie around when your energy is not high? NO. When we feel introverted, and want to be alone, this is the BEST time to do research, write content, schedule, and review work.  This too has a time and an energy, as you’d HATE to be pulled out of a networking group where you’re in the flow of meaningful connections, just to sit in a dark room and research for your next project.

3.  Be present.

Waiting for something to be over makes time ACTUALLY feel slower. Feeling late to something can make time feel faster. If you can be in the moment of EXACTLY what and where you are supposed to be, doing exactly what’s on YOUR schedule, you’ll hit the time “Sweet Spot!” The place where you control YOUR time. You’re not waiting on it, and it does not control YOU. Mind Blown, I know.

We have been groomed to do as many things in as little time as possible as new technologies emerge, and it makes us do half the work in double the time. Make time yours again, and schedule the whole time to be fully present during the activities that mean the most to you.

If you are looking for more ways to uplevel your business and life, I would be honored if you became an SRO Insider.

Subscribe Here:

If you’re into it, feel free to share this with someone you KNOW needs to hear these words! 

Yours in love and support,

Scarlett Ramey 

P.S. Hope to see you in the comments. Let’s rally together during this time and stay connected to stay on business growth journey.  The world deserves the BEST of you.


Isn’t it crazy how some content just snaps the internet in half, goes viral, and the ideas were all things you’d thought of before?  There is a magic to creating content that gets noticed, shared, and distinguished from other content JUST like it. Below we are going to go through 3 distinguishing factors you can use RIGHT NOW to make your content irresistible to the internet, social media, and most importantly your PC: your Preferred Customer. Let’s get started:

1. Reverse engineer the process and position yourself as the Solution.

This sounds complex, but I promise you I’ll make it easy peezy.  First write down ALL the topics related to your business industry (this should be a long list, folks). Then reverse engineer each one to make your product or service the HERO of the topic! Here’s what I’m talking about:

  • Let’s say, you sell silver bracelets. 
  • One of the topics related to silver is the question of authenticity.
  • You THEN write the content, “5 Mistakes People Make When Choosing Silver.” 
  •  And, what is it I see as THE number 3 mistake? Buying jewelry that might not be real silver! 
  • The solution? Look for the silver authenticity code, like the one shown on ALL of your bracelets (insert picture of your bracelet here). 
  • “This is an example of a company (insert your website here) dedicated to selling real silver.  Silver jewelry is an investment and you want a company that takes this seriously, so save yourself time and money by looking for companies like this with your next silver purchase.”

See how your bracelets became the hero of your content? All we did was take a topic of concern in your industry and VABOOM! You became the Solution. You provided information that will help your readers, gave them an EASY way to access the safety of your silver, and did NOT come off as salesy.

2.  Go viral.

Easy right? Well, actually there are some things all viral content has in common that you can hack, if you pay attention.  This does NOT include the Tic Tok or cat videos we can’t get enough of. . . that’s just the magic of “Awesome.” I’m talking about consistent written content that is shared all over social media, industry sites, and throughout the internet due to the results, impact and value it gives. 

What you’ll notice is that there is always One Specific Idea that is discussed. General info goes nowhere people! 

There also needs to be some Emotion behind the idea. One easy way to generate emotion is to tell a personal story about this one specific idea. Stories are like MAGIC in the content world. 

Then, and Only then, prove that it is Beneficial to the reader. How can they gain value from your content, can you provide a step-by-step how to get the results related to this One Main Idea? Show industry statistics of proven results from your idea.

Give them an AATA: an Actual Actionable Take Away.  Tell them HOW to do this right now. Challenge them to get the results you’ve shown work, and would benefit their lives. Give them a website to shop, tell them to buy your book, NOW for their best lives yet. You get the idea.

It’s important you write your content in this order. For instance, giving people statistical proof that your idea works before getting them emotionally hooked is like content kryptonite. You can wave goodbye to your readers. But if you can follow these steps, you might just see your content reach viral numbers!

3.  Take your general content and make it irresistible.

We want juicy content that adds value to our lives, and helps us become better humans. Think like the reader, and uplevel just your headline to something You’d want to read. Here are some examples of general content made into outstanding content:

General: “My struggle as an artist”

Outstanding: “The step-by-step method for going from starving artist to world-wide fame”

General:  Interesting

Outstanding:  Inspires action

General:  Vague

Outstanding:  Specific and results driven

General:  Coddle the reader

Outstanding:  Challenges the reader to do something to better herself

When we add value to someone’s life Without the expectation they’ll purchase from us, we win. The content that makes us jump out of our skin, like this does for me, if you can’t tell already, is the content people WANT to read. Can’t you TELL when a writer isn’t even interested in their OWN content? Why should WE be interested?! Find the topics that throw your hands to the keyboard and make you want to share with the WORLD! This is what becomes snatched up by Google, and other search engines. You’ve got this, I know you have passion, grab it and start writing. The world needs to read your content in your unique voice.

Wishing you all the best, and if you want more ways to uplevel your business and life, I would be honored if you became an SRO Insider. Here is the link, and if you’re into it feel free to share the link.

Yours in love and support

Scarlett Ramey 


Everyone is a potential customer right? NO! When we try to sell to everyone, we end up selling to no one. This becomes an issue when more potential streams are needed. There’s a problem, however, when we try to be everyone’s cup of tea. Desperation is pretty easy to sniff out for most people, and is unattractive as a consistent sales model. You might get a surge for asking people to support you during a certain time, but it’ll likely not last, as people depend on the quality of a product or service to sustain their buying over the long term.

Remember, the old adage, “The customer is always right?” If you are counting everyone as a potential customer, this could not be farther from the truth. So many businesses try to morph into whatever feedback they are receiving. The problem is that feedback normally comes in the form of a need, request, or complaint. Our best and most consistent customers will not give regular feedback, as they are happy to buy, which is the BEST and MOST important feedback for your next direction. Those who complain, disagree etc. have RARELY purchased from your business, right? Reaching out to your PAYING customers is your best bet. Ask them why they love the product/service they’ve purchased, AND what you could do to help even MORE.

When we narrow down our customer base to our “favorites,” we get a customer avatar we can relate to like a friend. Then it becomes a one-on-one relationship we can get behind. It gets you out of “selling” and into strong recommendations you’d make to those you love and care about ANYWAY. The interesting thing about getting SUPER specific with your preferred customer is that YOU become more authentic when you talk about your business. The reality of your passion seeps through, and people who are not even close to that niche will perk up their ears just to listen to your enthusiasm.

If you’re trying to reach an audience of people you don’t know, it loses its stickiness, as you have no idea what they want or even what they’re like. It’s akin to a lighthouse running down the beach trying to help all the boats, meanwhile, boats looking for this particular lighthouse are crashing into the shores. Stand tall for EVERYTHING that people can depend on, which is all that is truly YOU, and the right customers will come. Boats who need you and didn’t know they needed you will also come. Stand and shine your light that is your unique message, delivered in your unique voice, and you will never have to sell again!

All my best

Scarlett Ramey


There’s good news, we can hack COVID-19 to MAKE MONEY! If you open your eyes to how we are spending our money, we are really in a time of financial opportunity and can really take advantage of it. As dismal as stock prices going down, and employee layoffs look, we are actually in a NEW place to turn it around toward opportunity. It’s easier now to create wealth immediately AND invest for our futures! Hack with me to increase your money NOW, and set yourself up for the end of this time, which is coming faster than you think!

1.  Sell your stuff.

We know that if you’re home, you’ve at least THOUGHT about some spring cleaning, decluttering, throwing out old furniture, you get the idea. Make ANOTHER pile entitled Moolah! Make money NOW by putting the stuff you would normally get rid of during a spring cleaning spree in a pile you know you could sell. Set up an EASY online account with the smart phone App OfferUp and get locals to come and pick up your items for cash! If you want to set up an account on amazonebayposhmark, etc. be my guest, however this entails much more work, including shipping, advertising, etc. Let’s make this easy, as you’re already having to sort through piles of your stuff anyway. This is all immediate income you can increase NOW. This app is especially helpful if you now finding yourself between jobs, and need money now.

2.  Invest in the stock market.

Yep! I said it here folks. Stocks in general have taken a massive dip, and don’t get me wrong, this is NO time to bet on which ones will recover, however, they are all on SALE right now, some at the lowest they’ve ever been! Choose to smartly invest at this time by investing in a mutual fund. Mutual funds are like a giant stack of tortillas. Each tortilla is a different stock. When you invest in a mutual fund, what you are doing is investing in a slice of the whole stack. You get some shares of all the stocks. Dollar cost averaging is the principle of putting in the same amount (all your choice) each month, and continue to invest, regardless of whether the market is up or down. When the market takes a serious dip, LIKE RIGHT NOW, your investment even when it’s the same BUYS you a bigger slice of the tortilla stack, so when the market recovers, as it has for the history of the entire stock market, you have more shares at a higher worth! To learn more about dollar cost averaging, please purchase this gem, written by Paul Ramey on how to, step-by-step become an investor with the money you can afford to invest. The book is called Long Term Stock Market Investment Success : The “Dollar Cost Averaging” Process and this will put you on the path to investing, long term, in a safe way that allows you to celebrate when the market is low (more shares!) or high (I’m rich!).

3.  Start noticing the money you are saving.

Are you no longer purchasing your daily latte on the way to work? Is your car seeming to get 3-weeks to the gallon? Are you wondering where all the money is coming from now that you can’t visit your favorite bar or restaurant three times a week? It’s really adding up if you look at what you’re saving with this pandemic. Being aware of the money you are saving can aid in the opportunities that open up to save even MORE! The way this happens is, when we become aware of a thing, we tend to see more of it. Opportunities to save, that have always been there, will seem to be new as we are now looking for them.  I know you can do this, as you are one of my most conscious readers. 

Happiest of Earth Day (50th Year) to you, and I’m wishing the highest in safety and health to you and your family. We will recover, and I know you want to be on the right path when we do!  Let’s take advantage and hack COVID-19 for all the financial opportunities we can!

Scarlett Ramey


The question today seems to be an either or business. “Should I stay in business, give away my product or service for free, or just close down?” Is it more responsible to close down, OR stay open? COVID-19 has giving business owners a lot to think about during this time. There are so many in need, that larger companies are giving away their products and services for free. But think about it, do we need to do this in order to stay at the top of mind or relevant? Here are FIVE reasons, I believe online businesses are just more responsible during this time, so please consider staying open, and going online to help the community at large.

1. Stay open for those who DO need you!

We are SO grateful for businesses that are open now, and if you think about it, we have NO problem paying them everything they’re worth. Grocery stores, for instance. Thank God they’ve stayed open. At the time I am writing this, I am SO grateful for the stores that have stayed open. They give us more freedom to be out, choose our own products in real time, and we definitely feel more than happy to pay them what they’re worth, considering all the increases in work load they must endure. Sanitizing everything at all times, stocking times now taking forever, etc. We. Are. Grateful. And they’re business is making money!

2. As an online company, you are saving millions who need to stay home!

The decision some of you have made to put your products or services online has made so many feel safe in this time of unrest. You are encouraging people to stay home by offering the same experience of your business they would normally get in a safer way by not risking public contact. Masks are definitely encouraged if people have to be out, but the surest method of flattening the COVID-19 curve is to stay home. We are all so grateful to SPEND money in order to feel safe by staying home. The healthiest of us feel even more grateful, as we are probably the most likely carriers, and your business is helping us from possibly infecting the immunocompromised who may have to leave their homes.

3. Placing your products and services online shows you care about our most vulnerable.

As there are still storefront, or non essential brick and mortar business open at this time, many are excusing this by allowing healthy individuals to come in, 4-5 at a time, while they, “sanitize the store” between groups. The most likely customers will be those without symptoms, however these asymptomatic customers have become our heaviest virus carriers and transmitters. With the lowered availability of sanitizers for personal use, shopping becomes dangerous, as we tend to touch things as we shop. Even with gloves we are touching things that cannot be sanitized others may have touched. Clothing, especially, can hold the virus for up to 2 weeks. The danger is not that us healthy people could catch it, but that we visit our elderly or immunocompromised family members covered in our own, or some other shopper’s virus. If you are online, you are actually showing your concern about this epidemic, and that you care about our most vulnerable population.

4. Being a paid business at this time is keeping people employed.

Especially online businesses. The more you are open for business, and getting paid by your customers, you are keeping services open that safely employ millions. Your email service for instance has millions of employees working from home right now. They would all be out of work if we stopped being in business, and needing our business email service. They are able to safely work from home, and continue to get an income that wouldn’t exist without online businesses like yours being open NOW.

5. You’re keeping the hope alive.

The more businesses that can SAFELY stay open, the greater the hope for a resurgence of the economy. Being an open and paid online business gives hope to the businesses that must be closed at this time, as it shows people still purchasing goods and services, but from home, where they can keep a safe distance from the public. You are also being THE example of responsibility to shop owners who have wanted to be online, but never really got around to it. You are showing them it’s not only possible, but responsible. 

All my love and thanks to all the businesses who HAVE taken that risk, that LEAP to put their business online. You are truly leading the way toward the recovery of our economy.


We have all heard that gratitude is the answer to, well, everything. I’m definitely not saying the world is all roses and puppies, however, when we are in a slump, feeling down, or negative regarding our lives, we are not necessarily seeing ALL that there is in front of us. 

The truth is that gratitude has the ability to switch our neural pathways, and open our minds to a fuller reality. Gratitude is different from positive thinking, because it requires remembering and naming REAL things, relationships, and feelings that are in our lives ALREADY. This is why gratitude always seems easier than positive thinking, which can often feel like being in a state of denial.

Gratitude can create a balance when we feel low, as it gently includes the idea of, “ALSO.” For example, “I feel awful, nothing I do matters in this world, and ‘ALSO’ I am grateful for my relationship with my parents.” Gratitude will not replace the bad feelings or slump by any means, but it does end up balancing them out, and revealing a broader reality.

We think of victimhood, when we are not stuck in it, as a sorrowful place, where people probably feel lucky to have even the smallest things, however this is NOT the case. Gratitude is a powerful force that can not only switch neural pathways, but can actually rewire the brain to see opportunities that we may have never seen before. If we feel powerful, and can see opportunities for growth and happiness, it becomes REALLY difficult to be taken seriously as a victim. 

So are victims ungrateful? Seems like an awful thing to say, but think about the victims of any life circumstance. People in remission from cancer, those who have lived through struggles of natural disaster, or abuse tend to avoid the word, “victim” like the plague. People tend to identify more as survivors, as it just seems more accurate.

The problem with being a victim of anything awful like this, is the ultimate fate with which it correlates. Victims of cancer die. Survivors of cancer are alive and seem pretty powerful. Victims of Hurricane Katrina still don’t have homes, died, or were fatally wounded without answers today. Survivors of Katrina rebuilt their lives either somewhere else or right in their own backyard. 

How does a victim become a survivor, as the two have almost nothing in common? In order to become a survivor of ANYTHING, there has to be an abandonment of the victim identity. Now don’t get me wrong, people don’t just swing from victim to survivor, or just one day decide they’re done being a victim. Until, realistically, they do.

If a person identifying as a victim decides to look at their life, and FEEL grateful for any part of it, they are deciding to survive their current circumstance. If they are deciding to survive, they are deciding to abandon the identity of victimhood. In many Hispanic cultures, the definition of depression is a lack of gratitude. We tend to think they misunderstood the meaning of depression, when, for all intents and purposes, they understood it better than we do.

The second we can include what we FEEL grateful for, we tend to lose sight of our stuckness, as it is almost impossible to feel both at the same time. This means the second we decide to write down a list of what we actually feel grateful for, we are deciding to let go of the victim identity. The rest is downhill from there. I’d love your thoughts and feedback.

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