TIME Isn’t Important to Me, It’s Intimacy

February 12, 2020 by Scarlett Ramey0
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Precious Time

It’s definitely not a secret that I am obsessive about any venture I begin, so it often looks to the world like I’m on a mission, and have an agenda almost by the minute. This is simply due to the fact that my highest value in this life is my irreplaceable TIME. I answer even my personal phone with, “This is Scarlett, how can I help you?” Translation: “Get to the point.”

I’ve even trained my manager to NEVER allow people to know where I am, or my availability. She gets as much information as she can, and ends up saving me time. If she mistakenly doesn’t get the info, it’s a no. If she does get the info, and the caller still remains vague, it’s a no. It’s no.

It sounds counterintuitive, but to even gain my attention, it is mandatory that you come right out with what you want. Some examples of messages I get:

A.  “Scarlett, my name is Lance and I want meet you and see what we can do for each other.”

B.  “Hi, could we meet up? I’d love to pick your brain on something.”

C.  “Yo, I need you to help me find a Million dollars to invest in my Dildo business.”

Which call would I even return? ONLY C, why?

  • He didn’t bother me with his name, (strategically, not necessary at this juncture)
    • Saved me time
  • He told me exactly what he needed and why
    • Saved me time from listening/reading a long message that never gets to the point
  • He will get a call back, whether I can help him or not
    • I am always happy to go overboard for those who SIMPLY go out of their way to save me time

Now CAN I squeeze you in? Of course….

Do I really have no time? I actually have more time than anyone I know because I prioritize my time to truly spend carefully on things that are, well, meaningful to me.

I know what you’re thinking:

But Scarlett, let’s talk about A, that’s a pretty professional message, what’w wrong with Lance?

  • Dear Lance, you mentioned my name (not needed, as you called MY phone), AND your name, as though I’m going to say, “Lance! I’ve never heard of you in the history of EVER, but now, I’m ready to listen since you started with our names!”
  • You want to meet with me (as in face to face). With as many in person meetings as I have that have purpose, I know myself well enough that any free time I’d be able to squeeze you in,  as a stranger, I’d probably rather spend with my family, or doing something to help humanity. No offense.
  • You want to see what we can do for each other. . . let’s break this down:
    • I’ve never heard of you
    • I didn’t need anything from you, as exemplified by previous bullet point
    • As a stranger, do you believe I’ll call back/meet in person, without ANY context?
      • Don’t get me wrong: for a friend or family member? Yeah I’d call you back but still not meet in person, just ask, “What do you need? I’m happy to help, just let me know or send me the specifics in a text or email.”

And the gal in B just wanted to talk…

  • I do appreciate you ask for help immediately, thank you!
  • Pick my brain. . .
    • You’re asking me to again meet you in person without context, when I’d be happy to call you back with the best of my brain pickin’s for your need
    • I could be spending time supporting someone struggling with an eating disorder, writing helpful content for parents, or spending time with my family

Meeting in person to me means that we are ALREADY have business together. An in person meeting will never be my first point of contact with anyone, except my family and Charlie Day. I will stop the world and fly to wherever he is without ANY context. As one of my business heroes states so eloquently,

“If I LIKE you, I’m inclined to listen to you. If I TRUST you, I am willing to do business with you. If I RESPECT you, I will do business with you.”  -Naveen Jain

Well I don’t LIKE ANYONE who starts with wasting my time.  (She’s mean) Let me clarify: When you want the only resource I CANNOT replace, it’s pretty presumptuous to assume I’d spend it with you without context.

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